New Year, New'ish Me!

We're 7 days into the new year and so far, it's feeling pretty great! Yes, my husband is still missing from my bed and will be for another 7 months, but beyond that life is full of sunshine (literally) and optimism! Moving to Arizona has turned out to be good for SugarCube and I. We're more then surviving this deployment; we're actually happy most days. Baby girl has so much love surrounding her every moment here, which makes me so happy for her. She definitely misses her daddy and lights up when she sees him over FaceTime but the majority of time she's just interested in who ever will give her attention, table scraps and hugs :) Ahhhh. To be a kid....

Being here has also given me the golden opportunity to start taking better care of myself which is the MAJOR source of my happiness outside of my daughter. I swear. Most days I feel like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality, under going huge transformations. Thanks to my in-laws for pushing me to see the need and their very generous babysitting (which I think it's more for them and not so much for me, lol) I've been pretty active visiting my sister in Las Vegas (Oops. totally failed to write about that even though I did take pictures!) visiting the gym weekly, climbing when my sister in-law is down from Flag Staff, hiking, running, working on Shaun T's Insanity and taking brisk walks around the neighborhood with the babe. I get out often. Even if it's for a run to the market. I've also attended a few gal pal meet ups. I've been seeing a phenomenal chiropractor for over a month now, which has been great for my hip and lower back pain, ever since the baby. Less excitably, I've had some teeth sawed on (just finished my first root canal and hope it's my last) and I've also been seeing a fabulous spiritual counselor which has been great for my larger then life stress and anxiety. Over the 2 months R's been away, I feel I've made a huge change; I'm more the bubbly, adventurous, mischievous girl he married and I can't wait to show myself off once he gets home ♥ So hurry on home already babe!

 But onto the fitness portion of this post which is what I really intending to write about. My one goal over the holidays was to maintain my current weight and not gain anything back that I worked so hard to loose over the summer. Yesterday, I stepped on the scale for the first time since mid November. I was so nervous! I had no idea what that thing was going to say but no matter the number, I wasn't going to allow it to sap my motivation. I'm having too much fun to allow my goals to be squashed by a mere number. Am I right!?! Surprisingly and excitably though, I'm down 1 pound from where I last weighed! August 2012 was my last fitness weigh in where I showed you I went from 165.5 to 145 lbs in 2 months. I now weigh 136 lbs and have a lot more tone and muscle. Not that you can see it in these pics. AWFUL lighting and an even more terrible backdrop. But for the sake of making an appearance ;)

3 Weeks ago in Vegas. I haven't decided what was on the mirror. Baby slobber maybe? 

Terrible back drop

My goal is to reach 126 by the time R returns and have arms, a butt, legs and torso to be proud of! I say this with relativity. I know I will never have the body I'm used to, pre baby. My mid section might always be a bit "loose" and I definitely have some stretch marks to prove I carried a child. But that's just all apart of the new me that I'm learning to love this year... I believe what I see in my head is very achievable and I cannot wait to get there. So I'm going to be linking up with...

And the lovely, adventurous Kelly every Friday to help stay accountable to myself and to maybe inspire along the way! Yay for my first blogging theme! I've never really been good at keeping up with those but THIS I can do ;) I've been back on my clean eating for almost a week, minus the chocolate cake I indulged in tonight while watching Planet Earth, but I only ate half a slice instead of the entire piece. And I do need to get way WAY better at drinking my water again. You'd think living in Arizona with all this dry heat I would be craving the stuff, but most days it's a struggle. This is a must to loose weight as well as getting 8 solid hours of sleep a night. I've got my work cut out for me but at least I have a workout routine already seated in pretty solid determination. Now to take my own advise and get that 8 hours of sleep before my daughter's 6-7'ish wake up call ;)  I hope you'll come back this Friday to see how I did and maybe consider participating yourself! This should be fun.     

He's Gone

  I've decided the "he's gone and we're dealing" post couldn't wait until the reveal of my new makeover. A girl needs to talk after such huge events and after reading a fellow blogger's "dealing" post over at Learning As We Go (her husband deployed shortly after R) I felt really inspired to write mine...
I wrote in my last "quick" update that R did in fact leave and we made it to his folks in Arizona. And again, saying "Goodbye" to R was really tough. It felt like we'd been building up to this moment for MONTHS and then it finally came and I wasn't ready. But I had no idea the degree of pain I'd feel, watching him buckle our nine month old daughter into her car seat while saying " I'll see you real soon puddin'face. Be good for mommy."  I'm certain that a small force of outer beings decided to recolonize the life source known as my heart, right then and there because...OUCH! I swear I wasn't breathing as he kissed me one last time and I begged him to be safe. 

Taken while we were waiting to say "goodbye." She was such a cuddle bug with her daddy this day, sitting in his lap perfectly for 2 hours! That never happens. I think she understood daddy needed some baby cuddles.

Thanks to my sister in-law we got a nice family photo before he left (this probably isn't the time to bring up how chunky I look and that I hope the camera added those extra pounds, but wow I thought I looked thinner then this! MORE CARDIO)

It was pretty windy and cold that day, but SugarCube just kept smiling :) 

 Eight hours after we parted ways though and I had gotten my bawl on (silently) I got the text.. My sis in-law Suzi and I had already ordered and devoured a large pizza and wine and dark chocolate was setting the scene. We were doing this right! But there it was, a text from hubby staring me in the face

"So the plane is delayed for an unknown amount of time. May get canceled altogether. I'll let you know more as I find out."
I felt very confused and torn y'all! Don't get me wrong. I was GIDDY excited at the possibility of seeing him again, but the thought of doing this all over at a later date was not a highlight. Turned out, his flight was in fact canceled and I did get to see his handsome face again. The next few days to follow were torture though. It took three days before they deployed but each day, it was unknown if they'd leave. So we had to prepare like he was deploying every afternoon. OMG what a fantastic emotional roller coaster that was! We'd drive him to his company, they'd unload bags, grab weapons and gather into a formation as the 1st. Sgt delivered the news.  It finally came down to us dropping R at the Rainier Inn on post, the afternoon before he left and hitting the open road ourselves. We had already handed our keys over to the rental agency, everything was packed and stored and it was just time to rip the band aid. We were also uncertain of when he'd finally exit the country, at the time, and with my sister in-law needing to get back to school and work, it was the right decision. But what a HORRIBLE wifey position to be in...Oh well; it's done and over and we're finally settling into a place of accepted change. 
In terms of our new home and the large transition that naturally is, Jessica from Learning As We Go has put, perfectly, into words where I'm at with that...     "I'm figuring out where the little things like cutting boards, strainers and baking pans go. This seems like a little thing, I'm sure, but it makes me feel more at home. You know how it is when you are visiting at someone else's house and you try to empty the dishwasher for them, but you don't know where anything goes? Yeah, I hate that."
Ha! If you've ever done the blending families thing in a home not your home, you can totally relate to this! I read this and was like, YES! This is exactly the time and place I'm in. I still feel like a visitor most days but I'm slowly learning where things go, what foods my in-laws like to eat, how they like their time spent etc. I've already goofed though and keep leaving the stove burners on (a sign of a multi-tasker) I never clear out the extra minutes on the microwave after using it (which I'm not sure if that drives my mom or dad in-law nuts or maybe both,  lol!) and when I drive my dad in-laws truck I'm always forgetting to move his seat back. R's family are giants so my 5'6 frame doesn't cut it for driving space ;) These are all trivial things that I'll get the hang of soon. But I feel like this time oddly resembles the first years of marriage and that tickles my funny bone, haha!  
My in-laws are, really, just wonderful people though who are truly making this transition fun and simple. They have embraced their granddaughter and I completely, spoiling SugarCube into a puddle of maple syrup. They worked so hard on making a special space for the room baby girl and I share and even took the time to go antiquing for a wooden highchair which Grampa "G" cleaned up and Grammy "G" bedazzled! Grampa "G" does amazing things with wood and also had an adorable wooden rocker made and ready for SugarCube's cute baby bunz. She loves each piece and it means the world to this mama's heart. Could I have asked for a better extended family to spend nine months with? I THINK NOT! Mama "G" is really quick to offer any extra sleep, time alone or baby sitting services whenever I want too. I feel like I'm on vacation y'all but trying not to get too spoiled or take advantage, lol! 
Slowly, this town is starting to feel slightly comfortable and familiar. I still NEVER leave the house without my smartphone and Google Maps loaded on it, but I'm recognizing more and more landmarks and street names each day. I've scoped out the local Target (a survival must) malls, grocery stores, gas stations, post office (because I should literally camp there for the next nine months) and of course every girl needs her Starbucks or an equivalent! We're also lucky to have an Air Force base 30 minutes from here so Alyssa will still be seen by a  military doctor. Which I'm excited for! This means familiarity y'all and that is my life line right now; solders in uniforms, those aggravatingly slow speed zones due to PT hours, Commissaries, Exchanges, and even the "this gets really old every darn time" check points. I'll also have an excuse to use my military I.D again! You have no idea how much I miss needing that thing...Even though my picture is a disgusting 34 week pregnant shining ( not the good kind of shine more like I'm stretched to the max with water weight shine) face smiling back at me (okay my smile no longer existed either)... It's still familiar, makes me feel connected to R, which releases a smile each time! It's the little things y'all...
There is so much more I could write but I'm afraid I lost you back in Washington, ha! So in an attempt to learn the art of pacing myself, I'll save these next edge of your seat posts for a later time. Don't you just love how people go for long periods of time, then BLAH! They deliver a 10 page article??? That's pretty much been me the past 2 years. But I feel the rumblings of a strong blogging itch, so that's soon to change!
Hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving!!! 

Hiyo!

 I know...  It's been almost 3 weeks and you've been waiting to hear from me after the dreaded "goodbye" and LONG road trip from Washington to Arizona. Well, I'm just popping in to say, he did leave and my heart is still recovering...That was by far, the hardest thing I've had to endure so far. Also, my sweet baby and I DID make it to Arizona where we're currently enjoying 75+ degree sunny shine shine weather and we're happy as happy can be without our solider around.  I'll definitely be updating this blog in great detail and WAY MORE OFTEN (real soon) but I'm currently working on a blog makeover that I cannot wait to show off so I'm holding out on you for just a bit longer. Maybe another 5-6 days! Until then, I hope you had a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving, a fun successful Black Friday (If you shop Black Friday. I sure did and it was a blast!) and that you're enjoying the days leading up to Santa's big visit! See you real soon with a fun, cheery new look and a name change!  Stay tuned...